EDWEENA - A Hard Woman is Good to Find

Her feet were sticking out of the dumpster when Mighty Mo found her... But, I'm getting ahead of myself. Mighty Mo had been making a Father's Day gift at a ceramic studio in Salt Lake City. The shop had the paint and kiln she needed to finished her artistique creation - bookends, that looked like large stones, with a lizard or two on each one. She had meticulously formed them from clay, and had planned to make the stones look as though they were made of metal. When she entered the studio, it was hot and orange, and so were the tempers... She asked one of the employees for assistance, and was told, "It is impossible to make silver-stone, Miss." The place was filled with metal shelving, and reeked of burning clay. Mighty Mo suggested layering rust, copper, and turquoise glazes. She figured if she "layered and gooped on lots of it", maybe it would turn out the way she envisioned. The employee rolled their eyes back, and said, "It will never work, honey." She tried it anyway...

This was the day she would find out how her creation had turned out. She arrived early, before the shop had opened for business. As she sat in her gold Mazda 323 waiting for the store to open, she noticed two bare feet and legs sticking out of the dumpster behind the shop. At first disturbed, she got out of her car, walked to the dumpster, looked a little closer and realized that these legs were not human legs, no... but something less animatedd. Mighty Mo opened the lid, and pulled out a beautiful, 5'10" female mannequin in perfect condition. She tucked her new-found friend under her arm, and scurried back to the car, hoping no one was watching, and layed her across the back seat. The shop soon opened, and Mighty Mo quickly made her way inside to check on her book ends. There they were. Perfect! The risky glazing experiment worked wonderfully. The ceramic stones were metallic silver, and the lizards were lizard-green. The cashier that morning was the same person who had said the "experiment" would not yield Mighty Mo's desired results. She was wrong, and the proof was right there before her very eyes. There was no greeting, comment, or eye contact as Mighty Mo paid for her project, and left the shop. As she approached the car, project in hand, Mighty Mo was startled for a moment when she saw the mannequin laying across the back seat. EDWEENA has been part of our family ever since... about seventeen years.

"When Edweena made me mushrooms, she ate the grain and ground the groom..." The Residents