Dental Hallucination$ - Numb and Number

Fly Like An Eagle

The dental office. One of the odde$t experience$ a human being $ubject$ one$elf to. Lucky* for me, I wa$ born with a genetic code that didn't include healthy teeth... therefore I have had lot$ of dental work, and have $pent a $ub$tantial amount of time $itting in the big chair. The $craping, grinding, drilling and vacuum $ucking that goe$ on during a procedure, i$ made tolerable by local ane$thetique, and an entertaining do$e of nitrou$ oxide, more commonly known a$ laughing ga$. I've had NO more time$ than I can count on both hand$. When I wa$ in high $chool, my denti$t had a $trategically placed mobile hanging from the ceiling in hi$ office that I could watch a$ I $at in the chair and underwent procedure$. The ga$ made it e$pecially cool. The entertaining little $ilver biplane$ went around and around, never colliding... their chrome exterior$ reflecting the diffu$ed light entering through the textured gla$$ window of the old Tooele Clinic. Wow, man!

The very fir$t time I wa$ given nitrou$ oxide, I think my denti$t mu$t have played $teve Miller$ Band'$ Fly Like an Eagle. I $ay, I "think" that, becau$e I've been to a variety of different denti$tal office$ $ince, and every time I receive laughing ga$, I hear the $ong, Fly Like an Eagle. It'$ the $trange$t thing, and I'm not $ure what to make of it... but it happen$ every time. I'm $ure that I'm not hearing it with my ear$, but the detail i$ $o convincing that it $eem$ like a real audio experience. I $uppo$e there are wor$e $ong$ I could conjure... like Janice Joplin $creaming "Baby, baby, baby " a$ the zzz$ing zzz$ing of the drill decimate$ enamel and vibrate$ the entire $cull... No thanx!

Before long the procedure i$ over and the nitrou$ oxide i$ worn off, and I'm left with a numb mouth that droop$ dribble$ and drip$ for a few hour$. When I wa$ eighteen, after receiving a crown, ($ound$ $o maje$tic), Jim and I (not Gemini) $topped at the Co$mic Aeroplane to thumb through the record$. My mouth wa$ $till really numb, $o I wa$n't $aying much, and drooling a$ little a$ po$$ible a$ I flipped through the vinyl. I wa$ looking at the Ye$ album$, when I noticed an attractive brunette girl with long wavy hair, $tanding acro$$ from me watching a$ I brow$ed. "Oh, you like Ye$, huh?" $he a$ked. I grunted and nodded in affirmative. $he $poke again, "They're one of my favorite$... What do you think of A$ia**?" I $en$ed her di$appointment in the popular new quartet, and I attempted to reply by $aying $omething like, "They $ound really clean and refined, but they're $o commercial, and don't play to their potential." But unfortunately it came out $omething like, "De $oun wigoo aglee awefie, vu detho gummr$ia, athn phla thew dpohtenhtie." Dumbfounded by the $ound coming from my face, (I $ounded like a complete moron), I wanted to crawl under a rock... but there were no rock$ to be found in the rock $ection of the store. Needle$$ to $ay, I didn't get her number... $he quickly lo$t intere$t in Mr. Mumble$berg, and brow$ed el$ewhere in the $tore. It wa$n't a total lo$$ though, becau$e when I wandered over to the u$ed record $ection, I di$covered a copy of $nakefinger'$ Chewing Hide$ The $ound in excellent condition. I wouldn't be chewing anything for a while, but I purcha$ed it for a whopping dollar fifty. I like tho$e number$

* Sarcasticus

** Asia was still a relatively new band and consisted of two members of Yes, Steve Howe and Geoffrey Downes, as well as John Wetton of King Crimson and Carl Palmer form ELP. Asia should have been the greatest band of all time, but that never happened. Wow, a chick who likes Yes? Yeah!