Funny? Funny is a Funny Word For It

The medical industry is a joke... but jokes are supposed to be funny, and this joke is not funny. The medical industry is more like a cruel prank being played on those gullible enough to buy into it.

In reality, the medical industry's version of healthcare is actually sick-care because it is designed to treat and perpetuate sickness, from prenatal to the grave, and now that ObamaCare has become a reality, everyone will be forced to be part of a new oxymoronically labeled "health plan".

So much for choice. We'll all be forced to purchase a product that we may not even want. I would prefer to keep my distance from medical doctors whose treatments cause mutilation, side effects, disease and death. Unfortunately, real healthcare providers, like Naturopaths, seem to be a threat to the AMA, who would prefer to corner the market on your healthcare dollars. In combination with governmental mandates, the AMA can now move ahead with their agenda, seizing control of the care industry.

Former United States Secretary of Agriculture, Ezra Taft Benson, was privy to a heinous plan to overthrow the freedom of the entire population, and warned* of "increasing... control over America and the entire world." What better way to take away individual freedom than by making everyone sick? Why not make them dependent on a corrupt and poisonous industry that dictates all healthcare needs... from prenatal to the grave, collecting every dollar along the way?... The healthcare deception is only one facet of the plan to overthrow our freedoms, and unfortunately, it is probably too late to stop it. The Gadianton caravan rolls on. Smile and wave.

Have a nice tyranny!

* October 1988, talk titled, I Testify. Speaking in the capacity as President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, this was Ezra Taft Benson's last General Conference address, and he wanted to be sure to raise the voice of warning. Most LDS thought Benson was just a crazy old man. Too bad they didn't pay attention to his warnings. Although most LDS have bought into the healthcare scheme hook, line and sinker, Benson himself preferred to travel to Las Vegas, Nevada to receive care from Naturopathic Physicians.

Dumb Drivers and Blind Drives

Last week I was driving toward Santa Cruz on Graham Hill Road when I noticed a traffic sign that said, "Blind Drive Ahead."

I immediately began to wonder... If there are blind drives, does that mean that there are also Deaf Drives and Mute Drives too? How about Dumb Drives? There are certainly lots of Dumb Drivers out there.

NASCAR - cuz a million of red-necks cant be rong

White trash going around and around at high speeds... kind of like a tornado in a trailer park.

I've Always Wanted to Fly

My friend Ronaldo recently asked, "If you could be any animal, what would it be?"

"Well," I said, "I've always wanted to fly, but I couldn't live without my fingers... therefore I would have to be one of those Flying Monkeys from the Wizard of Oz."

Don't Forward This To Anyone

I despise forwarded internet jokes. In my view, these jokes are a cheep form of communication for people who really don't have anything original to say, so they pass on a few silly thoughts... almost always written by someone else. I decided to write a traditional Pearly Gates joke that makes a statement about something I don't believe in... Doctors!

Apparently there was a Dr. Rosenberg who had died, and when he got to the pearly gates, there was a long line, and he said to himself, "I'm a doctor! Surely I don't have to wait in a line," so he went to the front of the line.

St. Peter was there greeting the new arrivals, and he said to the doctor, "Whoa! Wait a minute, sir! You have to wait in this here line before I can let you in".

Dr. Rosenberg replied, "But I'm a doctor!"

St. Peter chuckled and said, "Well, up here you have to wait just like everyone else. You'll get used to it... eventually."

Dr. Rosenberg was very angry and stormed back to the end of the line. By now a lot more folks had arrived, and the line was much longer. As he stood there, he stewed over the fact that he had to wait in a line... with regular people. After all, he was a doctor. The more he thought about it, the more angry he became. And just as he was lamenting over all of the power and control he was missing back on Earth, he noticed someone approaching who was dressed in the finest shoes, shirt, tie and trousers under a white a lab coat, completed with a stethoscope dangling from his neck. "Obviously this man is a doctor" Dr. Rosenberg thought to himself. But instead of waiting at the end of the line like everyone else, he walked directly to the front, and without missing a stride, Peter gave him a thumbs up and a wink and stepped to the side to allowed him to enter, extending a high five as he passed by.

When Dr Rosenberg saw the scene, he was outraged and stomped to the front of the line and demanded entrance. After all, like the man who had just been admitted, he too was a doctor, and should be allowed to enter.

Peter laughed and said "You don't understand sir! That wasn't a doctor... that was God! He just thinks that he's a doctor!."

Please DON'T forward this to anyone!!!

Weapons of Natural Destruction - Who's Side Is God On Anyway?

Since September 11th the US policy towards terrorism has been, "If you're not with us, you are against us." Most countries have denounced terrorism, and those who haven't have been warned, sanctioned, threatened and/or conquered. On numerous occasions, President Bush has said that "We're winning the war on terror... God bless America." However, recent global cataclysmic events such as the tsunami in Thailand, and the hurricanes, floods, and tornadoes in the United States which have killed and displaced so many innocents, have the state department questioning who's side God is on, and has drafted a policy denouncing any deity who commits acts of terror. A complete list of deities is not yet available, but sources indicate that some of the gods who's most favored deity status is in question include Jehovah, Allah, and even Mother Nature and Mother Earth. No deities have commented on the new policy.

Circumdecision

My friend and associate, Ronaldo, claims that he is angry that he was circumcised as an infant without his permission. He told me that if he ever has a son, there is no way in hell he would have him circumcised. I asked him, "If your son is born a conjoined twin, joined at the foreskin, what will you do?"
Several years ago I was working as a pharmacy tech in Salt Lake City. Two of my colleagues were expecting their first child. They knew from the ultrasound that they were having a son, so one day, while speaking with the mother to be, I inquired concerning their decision on circumcision. I was told that they were planning to circumcise the little guy. After a lengthy discussion on the pros and cons, the best reason she gave was "Dad is circumcised, and we want him to look like dad." I asked, "If dad loses his arm in the war, do you cut off the kid's arm so that he'll look like dad?"

"Snip snip, slice slice, just me and my little knife. Can you believe it?"