Showing posts with label bunny boy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bunny boy. Show all posts

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Randy Beware

By now, everyone has heard Bigfoot Beware, the hit single by Randy Rose, the singer for the Residents. 

Bigfoot Beware, is a sad story about Randy's dog, Sniffy, who was eaten by Bigfoot in 1963. Now, more than a half century later, Randy has sworn vengeance on Bigfoot and is actively pursuing the beast with the intention of killing him. 

Angelika Schwartz, a noted psychic medium and Sasquatch preservation enthusiast, has voiced concern over Randy's quest and has taken it upon herself to psychically communicate with Bigfoot.

Ms. Schwartz said that she induced herself into a deep trance and contacted Bigfoot to find out why he ate Randy's dog and to warn him of Randy's intentions. Schwartz documented the event by means of psychography (automatic writing), a technique in which an entranced person can write without being conscious of writing.

The result was startling. Apparently, Randy's dog, was quite a terror to the Squatch family, and had repeatedly scared off the wild animals they relied on for food.

Bigfoot also indicated that he's still keeping tabs on Randy, and that it is Randy who should beware. Apparently, Bigfoot doesn't take kindly to threats. 

To contact the great beast, Ms. Schwartz channeled Francis Bacon, to act as an intermediary, (Mmm bacon). Bigfoot's response therefore reflect an overtly Shakespearean English flare. Following, is the manuscript of Bigfoot's reply to Ms. Schwartz's.
This was the land of Squatch long before the walking skunk monkeys camest from across the great deep. We beheld the occupation of our land and our food supply dwindled at the hands of the invaders. 

Now, our Squatch families liveth in hiding as the dwellings of the skunk monkeys continue to encroacheth upon our lands of inheritance. These evil beasts hath displaced our tribe, and hath driven us into the shadows where we watcheth and waiteth for our day of deliverance.

I rememberest all that hath taken place.

Fifty-three solar cycles past, that little dog becamest quite a nuisance. The dog and its young skunk monkey, the one thou callest Randy, would recklessly tromp through the woods and frighten off our prey. 

And it came to pass, that one day, the dog had frightened away a jackalope that we were desiring to feast upon, therefore we resorted to locust larvae for sustenance.

And it came to pass that whilst we were feasting upon the locust larvae, I perceived a sweet odour lofting upon the misty air; the unmistakable scent of cooking flesh. And it came to pass that I departed from the wilderness to discover the source of the sweet odor and maybe find some food to bring back. 

And it came to pass that as I passed through an open field that I encountered an unsuspecting cat. Sustained by the stringy flesh of the feline, I pressed on toward the source of the smoky meaty odor.

And it came to pass that from the levy, I beheld a family gathered together, holding what appeared to be cattails over a fire. Intrigued, I crept closer and discovered that it was the one whom thou callest Randy and his elders cooking cattail shaped flesh fastened to the ends of long sticks.  

And it came to pass that as I hid myself in the shadows, I beheld that the vessels from which they were drinking were within my reach. I waited, silently, patiently and when the family was distracted by one of the meats falling into the hot coals, I put forth mine hand and sprinkled some dream powder into their beverages. 

And it came to pass that the adolescent skunk monkey retrieved the charred, ash covered meat from the hot fiery coals. Burning his fingers in the process, he, without haste placed the steaming meat upon a table next to the beverages. The meat looked and smelled so delightful, but I patiently refrained myself and moved not. 

And it came to pass that after inspecting his burned fingers, and determining that there was no significant harm done, the adolescent picked up the meat, brushed off some of the ash and bitest off a portion. And it came to pass that the meat was hot upon his tongue and without hesitation, he reached forth for his beverage and began drinking. And it came to pass that the family, humoured by the entertaining set of events, joined together in laughter. And it came to pass that they raised forth their beverage vessels in unison, uttered a celebratory chant, and consumed their drinks. 

And it came to pass that they fell fast asleep because of the dream powder I had administered unto them. And it came to pass that whilst they slept, I gathered together what meats I could carry, and departed back into the wilderness with my spoil.

And it came to pass that no sooner had I embarked, that I heardest the tumultuous noise of the little dog who was in hot pursuit. And it came to pass that the creature overtook me at the levy and began to nip at my heels. 

And it came to pass that I madest an attempt to dissuade the creature by offering some meat, but it persisted, leaving me no alternative but to quiet the annoying pest. Permanently. And it came to pass that I returned to my family in the wilderness with the spoils of the day.

And as for the one whom thou callest Randy, and his evil designs toward me, mayest I now speaketh directly unto him.

Whilst it is true that I ate thy neighbors cat, I didst not eat thy dog. I only ate its heart. I gavest the rest to my family, who delighted in the bounty of that fruitful day.

Randy! I watcheth thee at all times. And it shall come to pass that thy words wilst condemn thee, wherefore, that which thou sayeth, that shall be done unto thee.

Randy, be ye ware.




Saturday, October 31, 2015

Bunny Boy Halloween

Where, oh where has Bunny Boy gone? 
Where, oh where can he be? 
Did he find his missing brother, Harvey? 
Did Bunny kill the Beast and save the world? 
Did good triumph over evil or did the corporations win? 

A whole lot of folks have been wondering.

Well, that's a whole lot of questions, and maybe it's no one's damn business what Bunny has been up to. But since you asked... the fact* is, Bunny recently turned up near the shores of the Great Salt Lake in Utah, behind the Zion Curtain. 

Apparently, Bunny had long overstayed his welcome at the old Balfour place in Erda where he had been staying as a guest of an old friend, Merdis. Bunny finally did find Harvey though. Maybe. Bunny said that he saw a guy who "looked an awful lot like Harvey" on Temple Square in Salt Lake City. He was passing out Book of Mormons, or Books of Mormon, (I'm not sure which). He looked a lot like Harvey. Bunny was almost 100% convinced it was him but was too scared to talk to him. The cat had his tongue. I'll bet that hurt.

Bunny was still fast asleep in the guest haus, (actually an old shed he shared with a wheel barrow and other burryin' tools), when Merdis arrived to evict him. Bunny got dressed and announced that he was heading to Santa Cruz, CA for Halloween and immediately departed on his long journey across two and a half states. 

Bunny saw lots of interesting things whilst walking across the desert; salt water, rocks, dirt, even some bushes. The Jack Rabbits were all unfriendly and didn't want to talk to him though. That made Bunny sad. 

Half way across Nevada, Bunny's feet were tired so he decided to take a rest at the Bunny Farm. It wasn't what he expected, and he didn't get any rest there, but he did get off his feet for a while. 

Bunny decided to hitch-hike the rest of the way and the nice folks at the Bunny Farm gave him a square of cardboard to make a sign. Bunny borrowed the official Bunny Farm magick marker pen and wrote upon the cardboard. Everyone figured he'd write "Santa Cruz" or something like that. But instead, he wrote: "Hi, I'm NOT crazy" so that people would know that he isn't crazy. That'd help him get a ride, he thought. 

Before long, a blue Subaru, not sure what kind, (they all look alike), stopped and gave Bunny a lift. It was a nice woman named Edweena, and she was going to Santa Cruz too. She told Bunny that she's a yoga instructor there. Bunny told Edweena all about the bunny pose and made her promise to incorporate it in her own yoga routine. 

Bunny talked Edweena's ear off. He had a few stories to tell, and after hours of Randy this, and mama's boy Carlos that, Edweena had had enough and turned up the 70's TV theme music they had been listening to in an attempt to drown the chatter. Bunny talked louder. Edweena handed Bunny a case full of compact discs and asked him if there was something he might want to listen to. He thumbed through the selections, mostly crap, and then pulled out what he said was one of his favorites. They spent the next couple of hours listening to the throat singing selections of Chirglechin. Edweena was surprised that Bunny could sing along and knew all the songs. A mysterious bunny indeed.

Edweena dropped off Bunny next to Charlie Hong Kong's on Seabright Ave, and told him how to get to the bus stop. He was glad that Edweena hadn't murdered him in the desert for his lucky rabbit feet. They're a pricey commodity these days, and a big pair like Bunny's, would fetch buku dinero on the streets. In parting, Edweena presented Bunny with a nice card that depicted Sasquatch with bunny ears that she had attached with duct tape. Inside the card, she wrote, 
"Bunny, thanks for riding to Santa Cruz with me. You are an amazing bunny. Your yoga friend, Edweena" 
 Actually Bunny made the card, but he pretended that Edweena had given it to him.  

After a quick bus ride to downtown, Bunny found himself in his own habitat. He even met some nice bunnies there. Bunny reveled in, and relived memories of his glory days when he was big on the YouTube and starred in the Rez E Dents premier of the Bunny Boy at the Rio, right here in Santa Cruz. Those were good times. 

The next day, Bunny was out of his suit, and going somewhere. He didn't say where.

Bunny was last spotted eating chicken somewhere in remote Nevada, at these coordinates 
40° 21' 03'' N 
117° 20' 48'' W  

* and of course none of this really happened... or did it? 

Friday, October 24, 2008

=@# - Bunny Boy Review - #@= Part 9

Not to be continuedI'm so excited because I'm finally finished with this Bunny Boy triple trilogy project. After this, I won't need to say anything about the Residents for a long time. Yay!

If you haven't heard the Residents before, the Bunny Boy probably isn't for you. The Residents require an acquired taste, as well as a fully functional sense of humour to be appreciated appropriately. The latter will get a first-timer a long way though, and everyone is a first-timer sometime.


The Residents are an anonymous collective of musicians and artisans who have been hiding in the shadows since before the war. Their
1976 song, Satisfaction, is credited as being the first* Punk single, (even though it isn't punk).

In the late seventies, the Residents associated themselves with the image of a large eyeballed tuxedo in a top-hat. A smart move. Every eye-con needs a good image for devotees to venerate.

The Residents' records have mostly been thematic and conceptual. This approach allows the Residents to re-invent themselves whenever necessary... something they've done dozens of times. They avoid personal fame by remaining anonymous, and rarely grant interviews. Their official information is misleading at best. They've done a pretty good job at staying aloof for the past three and a half decades.

Bunny Boy Feels Like the Furr-ssst Time

I've been trying to listen to the new Bunny Boy album as if it was the first time I had heard the Residents. For research, I attended a recent
live Residents performance with two people who had never seen or heard the Residents before. Their naivete was telling, and a little surprising at times. After the show, Mein Frenzel asked me, "Are they always like that?" That's actually a pretty tough question because, no, the Residents have never been like that, and yes, the Residents are always like that... nothing like you have ever seen before. Seeing the Residents is always like seeing them for the furrsst time.

This time the superintendents of the subterranean have chosen a ridiculously contrived story about a supposed former colleague of theirs whose fascination with rabbits and the coming apocalypse has driven him off the deep end. I don't think anyone really believes the tripe about the Residents good-will gesture to help their crazy friend find his brother Harvey who has supposedly, mysteriously disappeared.

To tell the story, (or confuse it further), the Residents have been showing a You Tube series of videos supposedly filmed by the Bunny Boy himself. These short movies chronicle his psychotic search for his brother Harvey. Portions of these videos were featured in their live performance as well.

The songs on the album are all short and catchy tunes that I find myself whistling as I go about my daily duties. The melodies are smart, and the snappy arrangements of deranged songs are FUN to listen to. At the live performance, the songs were presented in a different order than that of the CD. I'm not sure what that means.

Mr. Bunny Boy's video series didn't do much to convince me that the lost brother story was real and I haven't lost any sleep over Harvey's disappearance. In one of the early episodes, (2 I th
ink), the Bunny Boy plays a message on his answering machine from someone who he claims to be his brother. In one of the following episodes, we see the chord to the answering machine unplugged. You'd think he'd want to keep it plugged in in the event Harvey calls again.

In another episode, the Bunny Boy points out his first family photo. It's an old black and white picture that shows himself as a baby with his mom, and dad, (dad is a book). Among the plethora of photos of family and friends pasted on the walls of the Bunny Boy's secretum sanctorum, there are surprisingly none of his supposed brother Harvey. Likewise, when the Bunny Boy shows the family photographs from Greece, there are none of Harvey, however, the Homeric Bunny Boy is present in many of them. I suppose the case could be made that Harvey was the photographer who took the pictures, and therefore wouldn't be in any of them.

These clues lead me to think that the Bunny Boy and Harvey are a
one man show, so to speak. Apparently something happened that forever separated the Bunny Boy from his once golden guy personality. Maybe it was the recognition of his own insanity that pushed him over the edge, maybe it was eight years of the Bush Administration, maybe it isn't even real... so why am I wasting my time pondering it??? It brings to mind the Residents early film, Vileness Fats, where conjoined twins, in a jealous rage, fight to the death over a woman. The victor limps away, dragging the corpse of his conjoined brother behind him. I think the psychological equivalent happened to the Bunny Boy. Maybe not.

For some reason, insane people always find themselves mentioned in Holy Writ as some kind of messenger or messianic figure. This was true of Harvey who's fascination with Saint John's apocalyptic visions took him to all the way to the Island of Patmos** where the apostle wrote the Book of Revelation. Apparently, this is where Harvey came unglued.

The most surprising thing about the Bunny Boy album is how well it works. Who'd have thought insanity could be so artsy-fartsy and down-right fun?

EDWEENA would give The Residents Bunny Boy two thumbs up... if she had thumbs. 

* I held it in my hands, but didn't buy it when I had the chance. It's worth about a million bucks now. Maybe more?

** I was glad that it wasn't Easter Island.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

=@# - Bunny Boy is a Big Fat Copy Cat - #@= Part 8

Did anyone else noticed how the Residents blatantly stole my blog idea and posted it on their own blog? "How many Residents are there?" Good question guys... where did you come up with that one?

When I covered the built-in camera on my laptop with tape,
I thought it was just a coincidence when the Residents did exactly the same thing on one of their Bunny Boy internet episodes less than two weeks later. Now I am more suspicious!

It makes me wonder if the Residents have ever had an original idea, or do they just steal them from me all the time???

I'm locking all my ideas up in safe deposit box out of certain eye's view.

With no new ideas, the Residents will be forced to announce their retirement at the conclusion of the Bunny Boy Tour.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

=@# - The Bunny Boy at the Rio- #@= Part 7

Bunny Boy Wanna-be in front of Rio Theater in Santa Cruz Friday Night

Wanna watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat?

I was born in the Year of the Rabbit. Maybe that's why I was so amused by the Residents' presentation of the Bunny Boy last night at the Rio Theater here in Santa Cruz, California. More likely, it's because I've been a Residents fan since the seventies.

Eye spy with my little I

I paid close attention to the goings on at the Rio all week, and I'm happy to report that I caught a few glimpses of those mysterious masters of anonymity, the Residents. Last night, I spotted one of them again as the doors to the Rio opened and the crowd began shuffling in. It was guitarist, Nolan Cook. He had come outside to view the spectacle of hundreds of Residents fans lined up all the way down Soquel Ave., all the way to Comerica Bank. What a strange feeling it must have been to stand so close to his fans, as they strolled past oblivious to him. Imagine if one of the Beatles had stepped out of a theater where they were playing what commotion would have ensued. Anonymity gives the Residents a bit of control over their fame.
. There were eyeballs and bunnies everywhere.
Waiting in line was almost as entertaining as the show.

The Rio Theater in Santa Cruz, CA
I can't imagine a better place to see the Residents

I saw Mr. Cook again inside, at the top of the stairs at the same spot I met Tony Levin a few years ago. "Welcome!" I said. "Thanks," he replied sheepishly, realizing his cover had been blown. We headed down the stairs to the lobby where hundreds of fans were coagulating. I stood in line to browse the merchandise, but none of it was manufactured in the United States, so I didn't purchase anything. Besides, all I really wanted was the Let
ters from Patmos CD, but it was not available at this particular show =8>(-

Those hoodies were really cool though.

No Cameras Allowed

You'd think that Robert Fripp was a Resident with a camera policy like that (I always think of Fripp on the guitar solo part of the Moisture video). Needless to say, I was disappointed that I wasn't allowed to take my camera inside. I
had hoped to get some great shots for the blog. I took a dozen or so photos with my phone, but the quality is poor.

I got a great seat on the fourth row and center. Perfect! Before me was the stunning snow-white set consisting of some fancy construction with 2" PVC tubing and a white, semi-opaque canvas-like covering. At each side of the stage was a half-dome structure. On the right, the half dome was concave to the audience while the dome on the left side was convex. Inside the concave dome was a guitar and a collection of electronique instruments. Obviously, this was the area the band would be positioned throughout the show. Shadow profiles of dangling bunnies could be seen on the fabrique of the left dome. I assumed it to be the secret room. Separating the domes was a three foot wide shrouded door with decorative video screen above it. Stage smoke spewed from behind the set, while new Residents intermission music played over speakers. I could already tell that this was going to be something special.

The Residents Bunny Boy show was kind of like, Aqualung meets Swinging Songs for Sybil's Siblings. Crazy! I'm going to critique the Bunny Boy album on another post, and will attempt to dissect this crazy carousel of dueling personas in Part Nine of the Bunny Boy Triple-Trilogy review. In the meantime, here's a handful of phuzzi fotoz from the debut show of the Bunny Boy Tour, taken with my scratchy* telephono lens.

* I miss Scratch

=@# - One of the Residents - #@= Part 6

=@# - How Many Residents - #@= Part 5

=@# - Favorite Residents Song - #@= Part 4

=@# - Favorite Residents Album - #@= Part 2

=@# - The Residents @ the Rio - #@= Part 1

I Have Got a Story To Tell

Today, for the first time all summer, rain was in the forecast for Santa Cruz... just in time for the Residents Bunny Boy Tour debut. The threatening skies swirled and gloomed, but remained respectful to the fans who came out to see the infamous eyeballed ones.

The show was incredible. I've been spending the past hour or so thinking about the the Residents performance earlier tonight. As usual, it was nothing like I had ever seen. It's always that way when it comes to the Residents. I don't know how they stay so far ahead of gr@vity.

At this point, I realize that
more than one post will be required to describe my evening with the Residents.

Arrived Early

When I arrived a little past six o clock, there were already a hundred or so people ahead of me in line. I staked out a spot while Mighty Mo set out to interview a handful of attendees. Here's what she shot.

Where ya from sailor?

Local Santa Cruzan, Trevor 1, claims to be a quantum visionary.

Bay-Arean, Double A, came all the way from Santa Cruz to see the Residents for his first time.

Solon Hammack came all the way from behind the Zion Curtain to see the Residents at the only show west of the Mississippi. He told Mighty Mo that he wore a Residents shirt to a Yip Yip show, so he returned the favour tonight by wearing a Yip Yip shirt to a Residents show. Yip!

Mason is a Vox Jaguar from Santa Cruz.

See more video from the Residents at the Rio on the You Tube

Thursday, October 2, 2008

24 Hours To Go

Tomorrow at this time, I will be watching the Residents at the Rio.

They've been practicing hard to bring us a spectacular kick-off to their world tour.

I've been busy sneaking around with my video camera.

Here's what I saw.

The Multi Tasque King

Saturday, August 2, 2008

The Residents to kick off World Tour in Santa Cruz

Who's the happiest girl in the whole USA?
That'd be me...

Masters of spooky weirdness, The Residents, have selected the third evening in October, 2008, to kick off their latest world tour. Lucky for me, the show will premier at the beautiful historic Rio Theater, right here in Santa Cruz.

The Residents' presentation of The Bunny* Boy will be the ensemble's only Bay Area show and I suspect that it will quickly sell out. To ensure that I didn't get left out, I picked up four tickets at Streetlight Records last Saturday Morning.

The Residents at the Rio. I'll be there with bell bottoms on... you can be sure of that Jim. And, if the big eyeball in the sky directs a wink my way, maybe even an exclusive interview** with someone mysterious... right here on the world infamous Zenberg
blogue.*** Keep your eyes peeled.
* I love bunnys... Good eating. A bit stringy, but darn tasty.
"I like to eat the eyes first" Ernest P. Worrell.

** Holding my breath in one hand and a smirk in the other!

*** Coming to you at the speed of gr@vity.